What I Would Tell Them

I was checking out a recommended blog and found this posted. I am head over heels in love with it. Granted I don't have children, but I know that when I do I will feel like this exactly. I also have to give a shutout to my mom/dad for raising me and helping me write a good story.

This isn't written by Emily from the blog mentioned above, but the link she has posted for the write of this is broken...I wish I could give due credit as I think this is wonderful.

WHAT I WOULD TELL THEM:
(If I knew what to say.)
You are a miracle.
And I have to love you this fiercely: So that you can feel it even after you leave for school, or even while you are asleep, or even after your childhood becomes a memory.
You’ll forget all this when you grow up.
But it’s okay.
Being a mother means having your heart broken.
And it means loving and losing and falling apart and coming back together.
And it’s the best there is.
And also, sometimes, the worst.
Sometimes you won’t have anyone to talk to.
Sometimes you’ll wonder if you’ve forgotten who you are.
But you must remember this: What you’re doing matters.
And you have to be brave with your life so that others can be brave with theirs.
And nurturing the good in this world is nothing short of a privilege.
That’s why I have to love you this way.
So I can give what I have to you.
So that you can carry it in your body and pass it on.
I have watched you sleep.
I’ve kissed you a million times.
And I know something that you don’t, yet:
You are writing the story of your only life every single minute of every day.
And my greatest hope for you, sweet child, is that I can teach you how to write a good one.

The parts highlighted really pull at my heart. I can't tell you the times I have woken up (and gone to bed) and wonder if I have any idea who I am, or if I have forgotten. The more and more I have these thoughts the more and more I have pushed myself to define what makes me...me. Which also requires me to be brave. It is hard to go out into the world and grow up. If I panic about being on the other side of the country, away from my family, my nephew, my friends, I am sure everyone else feels the effects of that. Which benefits no one involved. "You must remember this: what you are doing matters"are such beautiful words. And while I instantly jumped to relating these to my work, as I sit here pondering these beautiful words I see more now that what I am doing isn't just work, but it is who am I am, day in and day out. How I treat others. How I behave in my relationships. How I represent my family. How I love. How I deal with my emotions. What I do with myself each and every minute. But it all matters. It all is inextricably linked to others, and that is a powerful thing to remember.

I am sure I have no idea the overwhelming sense of love that comes with having a child. I am overwhelmed with the love I have for my nephew, and he isn't even my kid! But I am sure I would tell my kids that no matter what anyone says or does or makes them feel they are always loved and were made to be perfect in their own right. I'd also tell them about how tiny they were, since that seems to boggle my mind. Tiny feet and tiny hands that grow up and do amazing things. What would/do you tell your kids?

I got nuthin'

I am rather uninspired right now but feel like I need to post.

• Bode Sucked. (sorry Bode....I still LOVE you)



• Figure Skating tonight...Olympic highlight



• The Bachelor finale is this coming Monday. I am anxious. If Jake picks Vienna...I am becoming a nun.



• I went to a networking event last night. Surprisingly AWESOME.



• Trader Joe's Mac n' Cheese= Bachelorette Status is now at an all time high



• Three loads of laundry the other night and I STILL have more to go. I am going to go bankrupt just paying to wash my clothes! $3 a load to wash and dry makes me want to do it up college frat guy style and see how many times I can wear one sweatshirt. Not really. But seriously city living really sucks sometimes.



• Outfit yesterday=magic. Multiple compliments and date offers. Fab-U-lous.



• Is it normal to be resentful towards your Blackberry when you want an iPhone, but feel guilty that you want something so frbolous? Like seriously do need to cart the internet around and be disconnected from mankind 24/7? Absolutely. Screw you society for making me feel inferior about my BB (angry fist shake). Pathetic.



• Lindsey Vonn? Men? Really? She is just not-that-hot. Get over the cheek bones, smile, and atheltisism already. Am I proud she won gold? Yes. Do you need to wear a swim suit? No! You are a ski racer! And Lindsey, be a good friend and steal Mancuso's tiara. I understand the rivalary of wanting to be the best, but letting a teammate walk around wearing her junior high homecoming tiara that she probably didn't win, but bought to wear to homecoming anyways to make her feel pretty is just mean. She will thank you later in life Lindsey. Trust me on this one.

Alright and one more gem for you. (Compliments of a guest contributor! Welcome CWF (Coworkerfriend) Sam)

What's Cookin' Good Lookin'

Monday night I made this:

Photo courtesy: MarthaStewart.com

Minus the tomatoes (substitute green beans with garlic). Yes that is right, skirt team in a Balsamic dressing with poltena. I must say my polenta turned out great and the steak...so good!

I found the recipe courtesy of Martha and if you are craving a good red meat dish (I was needing some iron apparently) this is fairly easy and seems kind of hard to really mess up. The only this is when you are reducing your balsamic...brace yourself. The smell is a bit overwhelming, but hang in there because once reduced...it is a savory sauce!



There was also some of this:

photo courtesy of epsion

And then there was this for dessert
Photo courtesy the Daily Scoop


It was quite the meal and makes me wish I could cook more. I think I am intimidated by cooking things that are 1)not baked goods 2) out of a box 3) in my freezer. But honestly usually when I do attempt some sort of cooking effort, this usually go pretty well. Now I just need a bit bigger kitchen. *Le sigh* the day when I own my own place will be so awesome...if even just for the bathroom and kitchen (two of the most important features in a house for me).

I am thinking there will need to be some of these made at some point...maybe if someone throws and opening day party again for the Nats I will bring some of these along:




Photo courtesy of MarthStewart.com

I love soft pretzels so i am sure I would devour these!

Also has anyone made Marshmallows before? This is high on my priority list to make before spring (they seem like a winter thing to make) but some good hot cocoa and some homemade marshmallows just seem like a luxury I would enjoy.

Memory Monday- Pilot

I have been thinking about how I have all these great photos from college and I haven't done anything with them (beside look through them and end up crying from laughing so hard). But I have some fabulous memories from college and my time in the sorority. I also just have some memories that make me smile (not document with photos) but figure I should maybe attempt to document them so when I am old, I'll have them written down somewhere. So here is the pilot for Memory Monday.

The House (sorority) emptied out most weekends since the majority of the girls were from the Seattle area and would spend the weekends at home sleeping in their plush beds and eating home-cooked meals. One weekend it was particularly empty which always presented to result in incredibly boring weekends. But there were like three of us in the house: Myself, Stephanie and Shelly. Somehow we got this great idea to go to Gameworks downtown Seattle and get drinks (nothing better than an arcade that has a bar in it) and play skeeball (one of my all time favorite games- probably like it more the BBHP). A few cocktails later the three of us are bouncing the wooden balls off the cage and generally making a scene. We had a bit of technical difficulty with one of our machines we were playing on and had to get help from one of the guys working the counter where you could turn in your tickets for prizes. What resulted is we flirted our way to like 5 free games which was pretty awesome. The three of us won a ton of tickets (because we pretty much rock at skee ball) and we ended up trading our tickets in for princess wands and these GIANT pens. At chapter the following Monday (I was chapter president at this point) the three of us used our giant pens to take notes during the meeting. I am also pretty sure I took my wand along to...you know...to maintain order in the room when my gavel didn't do the job.

Well needless to say my affection for skee ball never really died (and still lives on...if anyone ever wants to go play!). But for a beach weekend at Carly's beach house we got to play some skee ball at the arcade in Long Beach. Naturally we all won some amazing prizes. I took home a glittered flower hair scrunchy. But Stephanie took home the best of all: a flute/recorder-esque musical instrument. Many a dances were choreographed to Stephanie's masterful musical talents and I think we were all a bit disappointed when she didn't perform her song for Phil at their wedding (it was quite the gem).

Does anyone else remember any details from skee ball (gameworks and long beach?) all I remember is laughing until my sides hurt both times!

Rocking skee ball at Long Beach

Stephanie starting to perfect her love ballad for Phil.

Musica

I finally dug my car out of its cocoon of snow that it has been in since SNOWMG/Snowmagedon/Snowpocalypse/etc/etc (lets just say I am sure I looked like a hot mess in my pink uggs and my tiny little snow scraper trying to remove almost a foot of snow off my car) so I could drive out to Old Town and have a lovely brunch with Dave, Kym and Felix. I really love to drive (except cross country when you have deadlines and can hear the roar of your blown out wheel bearings) and I especially like to drive, listen to music, and roll down the windows. Today was so beautiful out and so after getting to talk with Dave and Kym for awhile and watch Felix play I ran some errands in Old Town where I just got to drive for a bit and rock out. I am a huge fan of T-Swift these days (Oh how I miss my Idaho country music stations) but I am also enjoying the new song called "Breakeven" by The Script. It isn't anything profound, but I enjoy it.

As for Taylor I know all her songs are based off real guys and her whole reflection of "growing up" which is pretty cool. ps...can I say I would do ANYTHING for her luscious blond wavy locks of hair. So beautiful!

Anyways I was in a phase where I was listening to "White Horse" on repeat for an hour on end and I found what T-Swift herself said about the song on wikipedia:

"To me, “White Horse” is about what, in my opinion, is the most heart-breaking part of a break-up – that moment when you realize that all the dreams you had, all those visions you had of being with this person, all that disappears. Everything after that moment is moving on.. But that initial moment of "Wow, it's over" is what I wrote "White Horse" about."

Good stuff. Anyways, if you haven' t heard "Breakeven" yet (and you are a female...) you really should check it out.