It's Showtime.

My biggest project to-date at work is launching today. My eyes have been twitching non-stop for about two weeks because I rarely have more than 10 minutes in a day where I am not glued to my computer screen.

It wasn't that it was harder than any of some of my other projects, it was just high profile....very high profile. So, if you know me at all, you know that when I am dealing with a situation where the lights are on me, and I am front and center. I hate to be a disappointment. I'm praying today; I am not a disappointment.

So here we go....lights. camera. action.

What is it like working from home: V. 2

Installment numero dos for discussing all things related to working from home. You can check out my first conversation on this top here if you'd like!

I get a lot of questions about what it is like to work from home, and even for me, who has been doing this now for 19 months, find surprising things I never would have thought about before. I want to share my experience and lessons learned so other people seeking a similar opportunity might have some insight!

Q: "How does it work with your manager? Do they monitor your activity all the time, or is there a lot of trust in you?"

A: I am sure I am monitored to a certain extend, and I will say this will vary on company. I loving working for a company that does trust their employees and really promotes the idea that is all about customer experience. That means, if I need to take a long lunch to see visiting friends, or go to a vet appointment, I typically can without having to take PTO because I can make sure I start work earlier, or later to ensure my customers are taken care of. I will say you have to be a great communicator to foster a good relationship with your manager for afar. I only see my manager on average twice a year, so being engaged online and over the phone is critical in creating a trusting, and respectful relationship.

Q: "Is it hard to cut yourself off and not work all the time?"

A: Yes. Yes. Yes and Yes. It is very hard. Granted this day in age most jobs can be done at home, from a laptop, in the evening or in the wee hours of the morning. So I firmly believe that worklife/balance is a choice and stopping at specific times each day takes planning and prioritizing no matter where you work. BUT. When your job is in your face every single day, and when your "office" is also where your closet is, and your personal items- it is really hard to be in there and not feel like you have to send a few emails or take care of something "real quick". With my job, if I had to go to an office I wouldn't have enough time in the day to get done what I need to, so being able to work whenever is really important for my role. I will say I would strongly recommend having your office in a completely separate place from where you do "life". I plan to ensure I have a true office when I move in the upcoming months. While a guest bedroom and storage place work, it works best if you are in a place that you can close the door and you don't have to go back into until the next morning.


Q: "What supplies did you have to buy to start working from home?"

A: Lucky for me, working for a "tech" firm- we don't use a lot of paper or printing. So I made sure to have notepads, pens, and really basic supplies. MOST important: a good desk and office chair. I am totally improvising with an old kitchen table from my studio apartment and a dining room chair which causes a lot of neck strain and back issues. Again- something I will upgrade when I move here shortly, but for now it does the job. But these are critical. Don't be cheap! You will be there 8+ hours a day and it should be functional and comfortable! Also...make it pretty. I have a Idaho print, shelves with matching storage boxes and a cute lamp. Simple things, but make me feel girly and pulled together every day.

What is it like to Work from Home?

It has been about 7 months since I started my new position and have started working from home. I had a bunch of preconceived ideas about what working from home would look like and I always get asked some of the same questions I had thought about when I considered a work from home position. I figured I'd open it up and tell a little about my day-to-day and some of the realities of working from home.

Working from Home FAQs:

Q: "Don't you get distracted? I could never work from home because I would be doing laundry, watching TV, cooking dinner, etc.!"

A: Some days are certainly harder than others, but I am generally so busy that getting distracted isn't really a problem. I am sure it also helps if you like what you are doing. I also have enough work that if I do have an off day, I pay for it working late nights and early mornings to get caught up. A few months in you will get into a schedule that works best for you and if you want to contain your working hours to daytime- then you will easily be able to tune out any potential distractions.

Q: "Do you get to work whenever you want? I would work all sorts of crazy hours if I got to pick my schedule."

A: I certainly have a lot of flexibility with my schedule, but when you work in a customer/client facing role- you need to maintain hours that make you available to your customers during their hours. I do work some varied hours, but that is more to make sure I am staying on top of everything, but if I want to get a little later start than normal, then I just plan to work a bit later in the evening to make sure I get everything done.

Q: " Don't you get bored and lonely? I would miss working with people."

A: It is a bit strange sometimes. I've only met my co-workers a handful of times, and my manager and I have had to build our relationship through phone calls. That being said, I really enjoy the interactions I do get to have with people I work with and it is critical that you take advantage of ways to stay connected. Make sure you learn about people on a personal level, and pick up the phone for some of those items that could be done through email, but those interactions go a long ways. On the getting lonely piece. Nope, not at all. I talk to people all day long, and my productivity has gone through the roof now that I get to control when I talk to people and in what medium. Overall, this hasn't been an issue, but I do know I have to put in some effort to grow those relationships a bit more than if I were in a traditional office.

Q: "Do you go to coffee shops and work from there?"

A: 99% of the time I am camped up at my desk that I've dedicated for work purposes. Training myself to know that when I am sitting at that desk, I am focusing on work helps me distinguish between work time, and home time. Depending on your job, I am sure you could work from a coffee shop fairly effectively. My position requires a lot of phone time, and I don't think to have to talk over the background noise. 

There is my stab at some of the questions I get! I am sure I will continue to hear and think of others that I will share. If you have a question- leave it in the comments or email me and I will do my best to answer your work from home questions! 

Working From Home: Awkward Moment

Working from home certainly has it benefits.Like the best commute in the world. The dress code that consists of whatever comfortable items I want. A fridge, Brita, and snacks I don't have to worry about being clean or eaten by someone else. No shoes required. Multiple work spaces. And simple pleasures like a candle on a desk.

One of the drawbacks...the comforts of home and all the things that come with it. 

Let me explain. I am on the phone for approximately 3-6 hours a day depending on the day of the week.

My job is basically this and this mushed together...I kid you not. 3-6 hours a day of that. Yup. 

So I am on one of my many phone calls and out of the corner of my eye I spy a wiggly, creepy, crawly, icky thing scurrying across my wall. Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Now normally, you tolerate it, keep one eye on it and then wait for an appropriate time to kill the sucker. 

Except this foul creature was looking awfully close to scuttling down the wall and IN TO MY BED.

Yup. Nope. Not Ok.

So I asked if I could put the call on hold for one moment. Pilfer through my closet and find a shoe, drag my night stand over to give me a leg up to the height of the scum sucked and then beat the crap out of the wall and the bug. 

There may or may not been a few $!#*&! going on as well, because that guy was BIG! and FAST! Yikes.

After rendering him immobile and deader than a doornail. I go back to my desk pick up my headset...flip the phone back on, and resume the call. 

The other end of the line.....was silent. Until..."Are you ok?"

oooooohhhhhhhhh no. 

"Oh my, you could hear that."

"Ummm, yes."

"Oh goodness, yes I am fine, there was errrrrr a.....well there was a bug...and I errrrr.... killed it"

Unstoppable laughter. 

So we all had a good laugh. I hung my head in embarrassment and cringed as I knew the bottom of my shoe would need to be cleaned. 

Working from home>Working from an office (even if there are bugs)

Job Searching

via

I went into this most recent job search having a pretty targeted idea of what I wanted to be doing. This made the process much harder, but also a lot easier knowing that I wasn't  hunting for just any job. Knowing generally what it is that you want to be doing is always a plus. I also realized that there were things about work environment, type of company, etc. that also helped direct my job search. I knew that I wanted to go back to the private side of business. My non-profit stint really had been for the experience (oh, and an experience it was!) but not with the long term in mind, and I knew that going in. I wanted to see HR not only from the private side,  but also see how it changed when you worked at a non-profit. I also knew that with DC being only a means to an end as far as my geographical location, I figured I should try out the non-profit world while I was in the thick of it all. Lucky for me, not only did I get the non-profit flavor I was looking for, but I also got to touch on HR related to the public sector as well. These different lenses of business and HR were exactly what I had been hoping to experience. 

All combined, it was good. I had all these different lenses in which to see HR and business from. I felt like I spoke a lot of "languages" after having to bounce between different people and different projects. I knew going back to the private sector now would allow me to do something different. HR is never (or rarely) seen as any sort of profit generator for a company. Now, as an HR person...I totally disagree, but I can also see how this school of thought has been developed and how it will be hard to break away from. I wanted to try my hand in being a piece of an organization that was viewed differently than just overhead. I wanted to offer expertise, insight and knowledge to generate a value to my organization and to other organizations. I loved that idea of working with a variety of clients. Getting to tackle a variety of issues and constantly having to rethink and modify my knowledge to fit their needs.

My job search took awhile. I was picky, focused, and not willing to compromise on what I wanted. I felt like one of those couples on house hunters where the host has to give them the "Your wish list...yea...it is a bit too long" pep talk. But, I am stubborn like no other and I stuck with my laundry list of desires. 

It's not easy, this whole "being an adult" thing. You have to walk a very thin line of what is best and what is necessary. Paying rent and having food in the fridge is important, but doing something that makes you feel like you are growing and is interesting to you, is really important too. Job searching is like anything else. 

It is hard, until it is easier. 

Living in a world where you are constantly inundated with information, status updates, updated titles on linkedin. It is hard to know if you are making the right choices for yourself. Feeling steady on your own two feet can sometimes feel like you are a new born giraffe with splayed legs. 

Like everything, it comes together, and when it does, it feels oh so good. 

So if your looks, thinking about looking, or just started a new job. Remember, it all works out. If you want to take some sorority logic to heart: "Just trust the process" (and remember that writing a good cover letter is going to be the golden approach!). 

Decorating a Home Office

After week one of working in my new "office"- or better known as the guest bedroom, I was pretty quick to realize that the set-up I had on hand wasn't going to cut it for a full-time office set-up. When I moved back in May, (not sure if I really mentioned that on here- but yes, I moved. Cohabn' it!) I was lucky that almost my entire apartment fit into the guest bedroom in the new place. What this resulted in was my dining room table that was used for everything in my studio became a full fledged dedicated desk. Granted I didn't plan on having it turn into my full-time work space, so the fact that it wasn't exactly comfortable was ok. 

So it isn't big, that chair clearly wasn't going to cut it and it was just the perfect height to make you look down at your screen all day which was not too comfy. Luckily I remembered that the legs on the table are adjustable and we battled IKEA to find a new padded and backed bar chair. 

Naturally, none of the cover options (and there really aren't many) were not appealing, but on the fly we remember that we had heard a lot about custom slip covers that a lot of online stores were doing for IKEA furniture. So my chair is just the gauze right now while I debate what fabric and vendor to order from. 

The bigger issue is picking a design plan for the entire room since we have a bed and other items in the room. I am leaning towards a purple and teal motif, but have yet to see it all come together in my head. If that panned out, I think a chevron cover in grey and white for the chair would be perfect. I have some shelves to hang, some accessories to buy (lamp, storage pins and such), and some brainstorming on printer location. 

At any rate, it is coming together and I now have a higher more comfortable work surface, coupled with a much more comfortable chair. (We also finally replaced that sad excuse of lamp for something a bit more...oh not torn and falling apart!). So if anyone is bored and wants to help me pull together my thoughts on decorating...let me know!

New

I'm hanging out in a hotel In New Jersey, having just completed day two of the new job. It is going well. Change, it is always good and this time it feels really good.

There has been a lot of "new" is the last 24 hours. New family additions ( of the fur type for my parents), new career opportunities, new people, new life style, new realities.

Doesn't it all sound so good when you use the lens of "new" vs "change"?

Change gets a bad reputation for sure, some of it rightfully so, and if I was looking at some of the things that have transpired in the last 24 hours I would say that they are that not so great change that we stumble on. However, maybe if I just keep looking at all of it with the idea of change there will be fewer feelings of sad or anxiety.

Lucky for me, I am living and breathing an employment dream right now. Keeping me focused on all of the fresh newness, and keeping that perspective front and center.

Ps....isn't she cute?

 

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Funemployment Gone Wrong

Guys what is my deal?!? Pulling out the ipad or laptop to blog is pulling teeth these days. I don't even have the excuse of time since I am enjoying funemployment and all. Speaking of funemployment, it is supposed to be fun...hence not tracking down a hefty chest cold and wishing that you had stronger mess than just Tylenol flu to put you into a cough induced coma.

So these 5 days of enjoyment and productivity have been thwarted by my desire and need to be asleep most of the day. Or watching tv while I hack up a lung. I didn't move from bed until NOON today. Sigh. Such a waste. Luckily, I scheduled a massage (my first one ever!) for myself for this evening, and we are going to see if I can rally long enough for dinner with the BF.

I did get some productive things done. Li

• Starting a clean out of my gmail inbox. After 2000 emails I needed a break but hopefully another spurt of cleaning will happen and it will get done.
• Getting my like-clockwork jury summons. Sigh.
• Watched maintenance plug up holes in our kitchen with steel wool and caulk, and then have the exterminator come and set like 9000 traps that are just begging to snap on one of my toes.
• And went on a shopping adventure to treat myself to a few new pieces for this work from home environment I am going to be adjusting to. I came home empty handed.

Not my finest 3 days.

I hope this is the end of this chest cold, and tomorrow I feel worlds different so I can have a productive and FUN Saturday and half of Sunday before I start this new job!

Just maybe I will find some motivation to get some more posts up too!

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Shifts of Change

Window in Del Mar from our recent CA adventure

Change. Sometimes the drastic changes force and create the small changes. The ones you won't notice right away, but the ones that all put together in a string of subtelness, create a larger, more noticeable affect.

Today. Right now. Something feels different. A noticeable shift in my universe. It started around 4:30 today (yes I can even pinpoint a time when this started to shake out). Just barely there, a whisper of change. Perhaps the crisper fall air, or the quickening of the evenings. Quiet. A scent of something new, mixed with with the past of something familiar.

The world has been flushed with good. Honest. Real inspiration. Be it people, news or nature. It is shimmering with something refreshed. The bad is there. The negatives are there. But around 4:30 today, I was blind to that. Immune to the anxiety that has been sitting in the pit of my stomach. I only saw sunshine, relished in the fall weather, and felt my heart beat just a little more in rythem with my head for the first time in what feels like years.

I've been begging for change. Pleading with God. To the point of bargaining, which is so silly, but so human. I wanted to see something move, to budge, to shift.

Now, it is in motion. Turning, moving, changing. I feel it and I SEE it.

My invitation is there. Beckoning to take this change and to run with it. To pull it is fast and far as I possibly can, and not wait for anything or anybody to tell me if it is ok, or right. Just to do. To act. To create what I've been wanting to create.

All these little shifts I have felt are all little splinters fragmenting off from the bigger change. The one that I thing is glowing with change- I took a new job.

Perhaps a bit more about that new job later, but I've wanted to get that out there for awhile, since I am thrilled about this change and the specific opporunity. Tonight. Tonight, I am taking this evening to sit, quietly, and listen to my head and heart and just feel those little shifts. Enjoy them. Savor them. Knowing that this is all taking me somewhere. Physically, emotionally. I am going somewhere, and isn't that just the whole point of all of this? To go. To keep moving. To create. To define. To change.

 

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Professionalism

I've been pondering. Opening a new post. Typing. Reading. Not feeling the words. Deleting. Closing the browser. Then feeling lost that I don't seem to know what to say on here right now. There is always so much pressure or rather self-created pressure to say something put together.

The other day I got a message through Linkedin (wow does anyone else just feel totally overwhelmed by the number of accounts and social media outlets there are now!?) telling me that this person was interested in seeing if I would talk with them about my career path. Career Path!!?!?! Um wow. Do I have a career path? Am I qualified to talk to someone about how I "got to where I am at"? Half the time I don't even know how I got here! (Or what day of the week it is!). It is flattering. To hear someone say that your life is admirable. Worthy of their want and interest.

It is also hard to remember that what they see, what they know, is such a small sliver of the bigger picture. Yes, of course I will talk to someone about my career path. What they will end up hearing is that is has very little to do with picking a straight line and following it. There is so much that has changed, gone wrong, gone right, been a surprise and also been so woven into my personal life, that talking about my "career path" is like extracting a few disjointed pages from a novel and trying to tell someone how the plot ties them all together. Again, I am flattered and I hope that this is the start of being a mentor, or at least someone who can give someone some ideas about things I have experienced and that they know they have yet to face.

I also wrote something recently that got me a lot of flattering and....surprising praise. It seemed so straightforward when I wrote it. What came out of it, brought me a little boost of confidence and a little bit of fresh air in my emotional lungs, that recently have been feeling so oxygen deprived that this was good. Really good.

Since this post took a turn for the somewhatprofessionaltopics I will always share a nugget that a co-worker gave to me the other day. "Show up with the best attitude you can for that day". Not necessarily the best attitude ever. Or the best attitude despite feeling really shitty, but just the best attitude you personally can apply given your current circumstances. I liked it. It is realistic. Factoring in that some days are just bad. Rough. Challenging. While others are awesome. Inspiring and Motivating. So you just have to show up....and bring the best attitude that you can given the circumstances. Wise. So wise.

Daylight Savings Time & The Dreaded Monday

I dislike mornings. I really dislike mornings where I lose an hour or more of sleep. I don't care about the being lighter and more convenient times of the day. I love winter. I love dark mornings and early sunsets. I love cold air and heavy coats. I love sleeping in and waking up to the silence of the world, all snug and tucked in under a pile of blankets.

Birds chirping, people cutting grass, light streaming in my window. I'll take a pass. It usually just means that 4 months of unbearably hot, muggy, gross and unpleasant weather is going to happen here in DC.

This weekend was just the start of it with daylight savings time. That one hour knocked me for a loop. There is daylight at odd times, I missed an hour of sleep, and just feel whomp whomp today.

In my attempts to milk every precious moment out of my alarm this morning, I was running a bit late for work and didn't have time to make coffee to-go this morning. Lucky for me, the bus lets me off right at Krispy Kreme (this is a blessing and a curse as I am sure you can imagine) and I decided to just grab my coffee fix there. I walked in with my super human strength to not buy a doughnut to go with my coffee (remembering I had my non-fat raspberry yogurt in my purse) and was so excited when I was offered a "sample" doughnut hole. Just two sugary-sweet-chewy delightful bites, but it was so satisfying! It was just the pick-me up I need on this springiscomingpleaseshootmeandIreallydislikedaylightsavingstime Monday.

When I get Nervous

When I get nervous (mainly at work), I twirl my hair. Not like the ditsy girl playing with a strand of hair and twirling it around her fingers, but like a good chunk of hair that I flip all around. HORRIBLY distracting I am sure. Talk about ruining my professional image!

Lately it has evolved into twisting my hair into a big bun when I get nervous. Perhaps it distracts me from what I am saying but it. has. to stop. I didn't always do this, so I am not sure where it came from!

I figure by saying it, I will be more aware of it and can hopefully stop myself from fidgeting when I am delivering some uncomfortable or unsettling information in the office.

The goal is to watch myself like a hawk this week and if I have to put my hair up....it will be done.

Yup. That is me.

At the Office

Something I can say without hesitation is that I really like my co-workers. I have some really awesome people that I work with. Smart, funny, incredibly accomplished, and we are all bonded. I swear there will be a reunion of sorts to get as all back together. in years to come. The last year of all our lives is reunion worthy.

Naturally these very smart people also share my love for all things sweet. So around the office we have become obsessed with the Sea Salt Caramel from Chop't. At 65 calories a piece, these little nuggets are heaven in two-to-three-bites. Bags of these have started appearing in desk drawers, and when you hit that breaking point, leave it to one of us, working in health care, to bring you a caramel.

They are perfection. Sweet. Salty. Chewy. Buttery. Delight.

 

 

Last night, it was a good friend, and co-workers final day before she moves on to the next great thing. To celebrate we headed too a rooftop bar, indulged in some summery cocktails and talked about how much we loved those caramels!

 



 

This morning it was super grey out. All I needed was a space needle out my window and I would have thought I was in Seattle! (A girl can dream right?). I hope we are headed into fall soon, skies like this make me lust for leggings, sweaters and a time when I can move my furniture back into it places since I can finally turn off the air conditioner. One can hope.

 

 

I have also been pretty busy at work, and I have neglected one of my favorite things! I forgot to flip the page on my royal wedding calendar!! So a few days later, I got to reveal this month's photo.

 

 

Now please excuse me while I got rummage through my purse to see if a lone caramel made it home with me this evening.





I am, I was, I want to be: Work Edition

I wrote this post a long long long long time ago. An old sorority fireside tradition that I should make more regular. But here is a work edition of I am, I was, I want to be.

I am...

really struggling to find motivation with the items that don't have pressing deadlines.

I was...

so stressed that I was going to fail at doing my job a few months ago and am relieve that I have found that I did just fine.

I want to be...

more creative with what I know and applying that to my job. There is a lot I can expand upon if I just carved out the time.

I Can't Believe...

It has been one year.


A year ago I wore a new outfit, took a new route, walked into a new building, was shown to a new desk, met all new co-workers and started learning an all new job that seemed worlds away from my previous professional life.


A year later I am still not sure if I made the right choice or where this has really taken me. Lately things have been such a jumbled mess in my head and my will to stay here in DC is getting smaller and smaller by the day. With that being said, my life here has been full and undoubtedly provided to me for a reason. I have much more than many people my age and was very fortunate considering what the working world looked like when I graduated. I have some strong experience behind me now and I think a better basis to decide what I want to do moving forward.


This was floating around on Facebook/Pintrest the other day:


"It may hurt for a while, but it’ll be OK. You’ll be OK. Oftentimes walking away has nothing to do with weakness, and everything to do with strength. We walk away not because we want others to realize our worth, but because we finally realize our own worth...."


While it wasn't 100% spot on for this workaversary it definitely made me think about how moving on from my last job was really hard. Like a didn'tthinkiwasevergoingtorecover hard. In the year, it has taken me time to see that switching jobs is something that shows strength and growth and sometimes you have to do it to gain more skills, a different insight, fresh perspective. Whatever you may call it. Sometimes you have to change what you are doing to see how you can improve all around.


Now with that being said. I am wayyyyy behind on reading for the PHR business, so off I go to crack the books and get through some information. On to new heights.

This is the Kind of Week it Has Been...

Yes I am so out of it this Friday that I put not one, but two heat sleeves on my cup of coffee this morning. I am really in need of this weekend!

And yes that is my Miss Potato head that sits in my window to keep me grounded and remind me where I came from. I-da-ho represent!

I have been going going going going at work for weeks now. I am recruiting for about 15 positions, and still trying to work on this big project that seems to be going no where, and then also fit in all my other "duties". It has been slow and frustrating progress for sure.

Amazingly we finally have fall here in DC. Yesterday it seemed like in a matter of 2-3 hours the temperature dropped and mother nature decided that it was in fact time for it to be fall and to have some brisk weather. I love it! I walked to work this morning just to enjoy the fresh air and the fact that I didn't break a sweat after 2-3 blocks of walking. It is supposed to be like this all weekend so I can not wait to get some relaxing, blogging, reading (the book I seem to have lost), studying, shopping, and crafting in.

Happy Friday!

Update

Can anyone believe I have been at my new job for over a month now? Really? Where has time gone?!? Obviously I can say that the new job is going very well and I am settling in nicely to the new role, new environment and new co-workers. (I still get a little misty eyed thinking about my old co-workers) But overall I know I made the right decision and I am very happy with where things are going.

I suddenly just lost blogging steam ( I have been horrible at exercising my blogging creativity for awhile now!) so we are going to switch to some bullets.

• I am loving my window. I had no idea that some rays of sunshine could really lift my mood like they do!
• My work schedule is different. I think I am much more in a morning routine and the "evening" routine is yet to be figured out, but I have been getting home earlier, squeezing in some jazzercise with Erin and managing to walk home a lot more to save some money and burn some extra calories.
• I am finding out just how shy I can feel and be! I know it always takes me a little why to open up to people and be my outgoing self to get to know them. Basically I need to get on this ASAP since everyone is super nice...I am just super shy. Shocking huh?
• What lady now has an iPhone and a super cute KS polka dot case? That's right...this one! I exercised some self control for a few days and then today....it all went out the window.
• My wardrobe does not quite meet expectations right now. While I am holding my own with what is on hand I never really took note of how casual and youthful my wardrobe actually was. This weekend we purchased a new all purpose black dress, a black and white tailored skirt, black flats, and nice jeans for "casual" Friday. I still have a lot of work to do to getting me looking like the part but we are making progress.
• I think the one thing I can say I really enjoy at this point is that each day I am constantly reminded of people's gratitude and how I am really an integral part of the group and my position has real meaning.

Hopefully things will keep moving along in this positive direction because I am really excited for what the future holds in this new position.

The View

First Day

It seems that "first days" don't disappear, become any less frequent, or become any less nerve wracking or stressful as you grow up. My first day at the new job is tomorrow and I am so nervous! I feel exactly like it is the night before my first day of high school, or the night before I packed all my stuff in my parents car and drove across WA state to go to college. I'm nervous. And I am totally having the "I hope they like me" thoughts. As well as the "who do I eat lunch with?", "Will I be in the cool kids club?". I had planned to already be in bed, but I can't sleep. Gulp. Wish me luck!

Via sillydad.com

Ch-ch-ch-changes

This has been a blog I have been  anxiously/nervously/eagerly/regretfully/sadly/enthusiastically/amazingly/andeveryotheremotionyoucanpossiblyimagine
waiting to write.

After a lot of thought (and tears) I have made the decision to move on to a different organization and leave my current job.

I am still in shock when I write that or tell people.

My job has been such a big part of my life for the past two and half years. I can easily say that without my job there is no way I would have survived the transition to the East Coast. Through it I have met some wonderful friends that I know will extend into my life far past this short time that I worked with them. I feel that I invested a lot in the position- received my first promotion and also learned the ropes of a "real job".
But change is inevitable and it was time to make a change that was best for me. I had someone describe that my grief and sadness with leaving my job is much like breaking up with your first love. You know deep down it probably isn't going to work out. But first love is blind and innocent, and you almost think it can do no wrong. So there has been some realities, and with finding a job that I think I can grow in and learn a lot from- I knew it was finally time to say goodbye to my first work-love.

I am still working in a somewhat HR related role- but focusing on some different areas and getting rid of some of the aspects I did not enjoy previously. I pray it will be a good fit. I start Monday and I am nervous like a little kid on the first day of school. It is strange to know you will have to re-learn and re-train on so much. And I sit and think "I hope they like me"- just like when I was 12 years old. Some emotions and fears just never change.

I will leave it at that. I am scared/excited/nervous/anxious and just clinging to the truth that I nothing in my life has led me anywhere that has turned out horribly. Granted I have had my fair share of 'backpeddling' moments, but overall I have been provided for and very blessed, and I am sure this change and decision will fall into that category as well.

Thank you to everyone who helped me through the decision, the process and the emotions. I owe you all for your constant support and patience with my indecisive nature. You are all the best people I could ever ask for in my life.