Friday, August 10, 2012

These are the Best Years

Are they? Are they really? I feel like I have heard the "___Insert time period__ are the best years of your life!" more times than I can count. Naturally there isn't any consensus on what those years are, but apparently there are years, that happen to be the "best".

"High School is the best three years of your life!"

"College is the best four years of your life!"

"Your twenties are by far the best years of your life!"

and now I am hearing that I am now supposed to be looking forward to my thirties!!?!

First of all, let's get something straight. My thirties scare the living daylights out of me. I think I have such expectations of what my life will hold by thirty, that I am terrified to get there, and possibly be unmarried, without kids or any sight of kids and still living in 415 rented square feet.

On the flip side I can't wait for my thirties. Maybe because I hope to be more established. Less in that IonlycanownIKEAfurnitureandshopatONformyclothes stage of my life. Additionally....I hope poodle ownership will come in my thirties as well.

My twenties seemed like the time that I would get a lot done in. You know, like conquer the world. Save a company from total meltdown. Be the answer to some man's prayers. Rescue multiple homeless poodles. Donating more money to the SPCA than Sarah McLaughlin knows what to do it.

Now I will say my college years were truly awesome. Without flaw or drama?...not even close. But I wouldn't have changed a thing about those years.

High school...well let's just say I survived! No really, it wasn't bad, but I wouldn't say that I would go back to high school given the change.

So what am I saying? I guess I am saying...What are the best years of your life? When do you know you are living out these epic years. What is that supposed to look like?

Well I am sure there aren't any answers. There is certainly no way to live your life to ensure you are living "the best years of your life". I do have to say, I am not sure I am a fan of this "best years" statement. I mean, what happens after these "best years" that everyone keeps referring to!?

Do you just shrivel up and become old and lame after that last ditch attempt for the "best years" in your thirties (surely not as I know some pretty awesome older than 30 people!).

So why has this become in infatuation to try to pin a certain specified period of your life to be something that comes with all these expectations. Looking forward to these years that will just magically bring the most amazing opportunities, memories, friends, love, success and general amazingness. In searching for some others thoughts on this subject I came across a quote:

The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the President. You realize that you control your own destiny
Albert Ellis

BAM! There. That sums up my thoughts. You create the best years of your life. You create the best days, the best moments, and the decision to control your destiny.

So while I am sure there is someone out there telling me that these years in my twenties are magical and have unicorns running in the streets, I like the idea better that I determine what are the best years of my life. Maybe they aren't all going to be clumped together, and I sure as hell hope it isn't just 3 or 4 short years, but rather periods of time throughout my life that write a wonderful tale.

1 comment:

  1. I heard those same exact statements growing up. After college and after getting married I decided that why should I let someone else decide what years would be the best for me. SO I just decided to make every year te best. To enjoy my life at the present state and to {attempt} not worry aouu the future and what was supposed to happen in my life plan. If I were still obsessed with my life plan I would probably be in a state of depression. I recently turned 30 and that was a hard age to swallow, but I did and now I just continue trucking along ;)
    Oh came across your blog on the ADPi section of the greek blog.