My Version of Philosophy

At some point in high school I had to do a project on a famous author. (I want to say this was for AP English, but correct me if anyone remembers differently). Anyways, I somehow ended up with Annie Dillard. Today walking home I remembered how much I actually enjoyed this project. I think they required that we read two books by our author and then do some sort of report. I remember reading Dillard and out of no where she would have a one liner that would just strike a chord. One that really has stuck with me has been:

"The dedicated life is worth living. You must give with your whole heart."

I think this really has meaning in a lot of ways. Especially for me. I am so driven by "what next" or thinking about how to get to point B, rather than stopping and thinking about being at point A and experiencing what that means and what that requires. I will say I feel like I do live my life with a lot of dedication. In particular I am dedicated to my family, my friends, being a good person (interpret that how you want) and most importantly...love. I think my level of dedication to my relationships with people is my way of showing my love. While I have learned that words often fail me (unless they are written), I have to hope that people see that my dedication is a reflection of my love for them. For me this links to the second part, if you are dedicated, truly dedicated, you have your entire heart into something. No shortcuts, no holding back, no avoiding emotion or confrontation (yes you can all laugh), but delving in and investing your whole heart with result in a deep level of dedication and thus a never ending love for someone.

To keep on this emotional rant I have going right now and in some more recent posts. I was talking to SM the other day and she was stressing over how she feels like she is still discovering who she is and how that translates and effects a relationship. And I can completely relate to her. Deep down I am convinced that we are never done with understanding ourselves and learning who we are. But since I was analyzing her life (I fail at doing this with mine) I was able to come up with some deep logic on this. And that is, people are in your life to help you learn about yourself. While someone may have one aspect of their life figured out and to a point where they understand themselves, they may flounder in an area where you are completely comfortable. The whole reason we have relationships/friendships/etc is to have people who push us to discover more and learn more about ourselves. So not having it figured out is half the fun. The people who will be in your life will like you exactly for who you are right here and now and also enjoy the idea of who you could become and respect that no one has any idea who that will be.

So in short, I am so blessed to have so many people in my life who are pushing me to define myself and love me for me.

Phew...another mushy post about feelings. Time to get back to blogging about nonsense!